A Tinder again
Yesterday I decided to make a Tinder account again. I have been thinking about it for a bit with the intention of making a stupid profile, but I ended up just making a normal one with some help from friends. I still miss some of the parts from my relationship with A, but at the same time, my memory is pretty hazy and so I don’t have anything concrete to hold. I think missing things is not necessarily a bad thing, but as my therapist said, a reminder of something you want in the future. And some sort of incentive to push yourself to get something like that again. I hope she’s doing well. I wanted to reach out to her just to talk and I guess convince myself that we are on good terms, but my therapist talked about several other things I didn’t consider and how it may not be a good idea. Eventually, I settled on the thought that it would ultimately hurt her, since I don’t think she’s been able to take the time to really process it or work through things; now it becomes selfish for me to reach out to her again since I know that it would likely hurt her and so I don’t want to do that. I think I can comfortably say that I still love her now, but in the sense that I want good things to happen to her, just not involving me.