Before Your Eyes pt. 2

October 28, 2023

I tried convincing myself against it while turning left. My dad’s calling again.

I thought about the things I’d miss. I wouldn’t get to see sunsets or hug Hash again. I wouldn’t get to smell the leaves of a jacaranda tree on the way back from the gym. I wouldn’t get to meet new people. I wouldn’t get to see my friends again.

I used to always have great, wonderful moments happen – and then somehow ruin them and I would end up feeling depressed. I would believe that after great things, horrible things would happen. At some point, I wanted to convince myself that after horrible things, great things would also happen. I hope that’s the case. I think I’m due for a rainbow.

I miss being happy and content with life like I was over the summer. What changed?