An Open Letter

I’m gonna actually do my best to sleep early tonight for the first time fucking ever. But I guess I wanted to write down a little bit first. Today for some reason I sent E a fit picture, she responded so positively I got fully taken aback. It surprisingly hit me really really deeply, and I think the reason why it was because it felt like even though I wasn’t posing or performing to try to look hot or something, she still was super enthusiastic to see it. And that made me feel like she likes me, not me when I’m posing, or me in certain pictures. Like it feels like she sees me and she likes that. And it’s kind of stupid it makes me wanna cry like breathing out a sigh of relief from something I didn’t even know I was holding onto. Like I feel loved. I feel accepted. Holy shit.