Mantra
I did squats today, second day back at the gym since starting to recover from this sickness. The program started with 225x10 which is apparently a pr. 6 sets of it. The first set hurt so fucking bad, my back hurt, my wrist hurt, and my lungs felt like they were dying. I wanted to stop so badly and just skip it and make an excuse. I dug deeper than I have in a long time. On the second set my back hurt more, everything felt horrible. I was getting very lightheaded and I would have stopped or taken it easier before. I thought about that study on positive self talk mid set. But it hurt and my body was screaming to quit. And so I kept chanting in my head “it hurts and I want it.” I kept mentally saying it until I was yelling in my head, and I got through three sets before I felt I had done enough to skip the rest. I got through it. And I’m proud of myself. I had to hold myself on the bar to let my heart and lungs catch up, but I did it. I’m grateful for the ambition to chase something hard. Even when it’s things that seem small it’s the willingness to push past what I think is right.