Three things
I heard someone Describe the world as everyone having three things they can make a priority. They were originally describing it by saying how they would see someone that is incredibly muscular and think wow they look so good and instead of thinking, why don’t I look like that, it becomes that is one of their three priorities and if I made it my priority, I could also have that, but I choose not to. There are a lot of different ways I can apply this, but I’ve been thinking about it and I feel like my three priorities are powerlifting, socialization and building a social network, and I feel like I need to include Work. I’m not 100% sure if that is accurate because I do have pretty good work life balance and I know that there are very much a lot of friends and jobs where you can’t really step away from it the same way I do. But I’ve been wondering if I think that a relationship is one of these three things to me. Ignoring the fact that it’s kind of difficult to just consciously go ahead and put more effort into actively searching for a relationship, because I don’t really think that dating apps are necessarily too helpful in that regard, but just generally, I feel like one of the ways to cope with life is to not prioritize a relationship. Instead of going crazy waiting for it you can focus on the other things that make life enjoyable, and those will inherently lead to being a more desirable person and hopefully how you meet another person. But I also think about how in a relationship that is something that requires a lot of time and effort, and it’s a little bit weird to think about it in the lens that something or other will have to change or be given up. I think this shows itself a lot in something like a person getting into a relationship and then spending less time with their friends. I know I was very much guilty of this, and I guess it’s kind of natural because you are more or less spending most of your time with your partner out of other people I think. But I also think it could show up in ways like not attending to specific hobbies the same way, especially when those hobbies are kind of a means to meet a partner. I go to the gym and like powerlifting not really for a partner, that would be cool, but I’m doing these things because I enjoy them and in a relationship there’s no question I would continue to do these things. I can see however me maybe try other hobbies or things like that with the intention of finding a partner. And it feels like a weirdly disingenuous thing in my mind.