Yet another rushed post

I ended up picking her up from the bus station a bit ago, and we got in and out afterward. It ended up being a weird little first date I guess.

I don’t like how I’ve been doing this journaling + CBT right before I sleep, as it always feels rushed. I wonder if it’s becoming something I feel forced to do. I don’t think it is, and I think it’s good for my mental health so I’ll try to continue with it. That being said, I’m keeping this one incredibly short.

Situation: She was pretty awkward first time I met her in person for various reasons, and as a result I was a bit awkward too.

Thoughts: This is just what it is.

Feelings: I feel conflicted, as it definitely wasn’t incredibly comfortable.

Behavior: Generalize this to future dates

Thoughts: we explicitly went into this with that context, since it was late at night and we both weren’t really presentable. It still wasn’t bad!

Feelings: I feel like the pressure of “first date” is off now, so tomorrow’s date should go smoother.

Behavior: Less pressure on me, things went fine – I am chilling.

I’m pretty tired and a bit confused, this is relatively uncharted territory for me. Oh well! Love you Anshuman ♥