A digital journal
I dropped off E at the airport, and I cried a hefty amount before she left. I know that she is not gone or anything like that, it’s just a temporary long distance. We game all the time so I know it’s not going to be a huge problem, but I do miss her.
E is sleeping over, but then going away for a while. I’m honestly not sure how I’m going to handle it.
We went 0-5 in our games, I love her so much
Last night I was so exhausted I gave up on journaling or gratitude. It’s going to hurt with E gone for so long. I try not to think about it but I’m afraid.
I’m right now walking Hash, And I just have this Vague feeling about how I’m unhappy with my current life state. But I really want to remind myself that there aren’t necessarily big reasons to feel this way other than just the fact that this is what I’m used to in my comfortable state in my mind. But I also do have a lot of choice on perspective, if I choose to focus on the things where I feel good about my life then I will feel that way.
What a shit concert LOL but I’m just glad E was with me.
It’s so strange how I never write anything anymore. I feel like I’ve really cheapened this entire “project”, but to be honest, I have had an outlet in E since meeting her. I have my social needs met, and I have someone I can talk more than enough to. I’m not really sure how I’m supposed to have the urge to journal when I have that person there who wants to listen.
After the big O I feel that low when I’m low on chemicals, and I need to remember to just let my mind clear and not worry. I’m just low not sad.
Advent of code started! Only 12 days sadly this year.
Drove home, and then needed to throw up. But trips over. Love E so much.